Wynonna Judd is reflecting on her mother’s death, five months after Naomi Judd died by suicide.
In an upcoming interview with People Magazine, Wynonna detailed what life has been like without her mother. Naomi was 76 when she died.
“I’ll tell you what I know about death. In death, there is life. I feel both at the same time simultaneously,” Wynonna, 58, told the outlet. “I feel joy and sorrow. I’m walking in paradox. I’m literally a walking contradiction. I feel joy. I feel pain. I feel light. I feel dark.”
Wynonna said that although she considers herself “pretty tough,” she also has a “tender” side. She shared that she’s relied on her “really wicked sense of humor,” but noted that grieving is very complex.
“How am I coping? It depends on the [situation],” she said. “I’m on the phone talking and all of a sudden I’ll just begin to weep. Then 10 minutes later, I’m making a dinner, and I’m talking to my husband about our date night. Then my granddaughter comes and I cry some more. I cry a lot. That’s okay… It doesn’t mean it’s a sign of weakness.”
Wynonna begins “The Judds: The Final Tour” on Sept. 30. The scheduled tour was intended to be a mother-daughter reunion, but since Naomi’s death, Wynonna has committed to completing the tour alone.
Naomi and Wynonna formed the musical duo The Judds in 1983. The two won five Grammy Awards and scored 14 No. 1 songs in a career that spanned nearly three decades.
“When you lose someone you love, it’s like, ‘Holy crap, this is really happening. Is this really happening?’ Your brain goes, ‘No, this isn’t really happening,'” she shared. “Then you go home, and I realize, yeah, my mom’s not here anymore.”
Although Wynonna is uncertain about what the future holds, she noted to the outlet that it will be a chance to heal.
“This is my opportunity to step into a situation that I don’t know that I am ready to do what I’m about to do, but I think it’s going to heal me,” she said. “I’m teaching what I want to learn, which is how to have peace and joy in a really negative [space]. I want people to know that they’re loved. I want people to know that there is hope.”
Wynonna will begin her tour in Michigan and will play 11 shows before concluding in October. She will be joined by special guests Martina McBride, Faith Hill, Brandi Carlile, Ashley McBryde, Little Big Town and Trisha Yearwood.
Judd died from a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head, an autopsy report obtained by Fox News Digital revealed in August.
“We have always shared openly both the joys of being family as well its sorrows, too. One part of our story is that our matriarch was dogged by an unfair foe,” an official statement from Judd’s family that was provided to The Associated Press read.
The statement continued, “She was treated for PTSD and bipolar disorder, to which millions of Americans can relate.”
Naomi died the day before she and Wynonna were inducted into the Country Music Hall of Fame.
If you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide, please contact the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988 or 1-800-273-TALK (8255).